summer has begun (teaching)

It is official. My summer has begun. At 7 p.m. today, I left my last class for the summer session. I think that I learned something this semester...about literacy development. The classes let me fine-tune the information I had been collecting, in my classroom, all year. I feel like I will be a different teacher in September. I feel like I have real information to base my actions on in the classroom. Of course, my bar for self-evaluation is now much higher and I will have more tools to use when I am looking to find fault with myself. But, that's the price I pay.

No one really evaluates your work in a consistent nature in a school. People have an idea of how much you yell (if it can be heard in the hallway, if you yell in the lunchroom, etc.). People see how your class walks through the halls. And, of course, there are standardized tests. But, very few adults will witness your teaching on a consistent basis.

This year (my first year teaching), I had mentors, literacy coaches, APs, and principals observe me on a very regular basis. But, I feel as if my self-evaluation process was the only true feedback I could use to learn what it means to teach. Well, that and all of the students. They were the true evaluation of my abilities to be a teacher.

This September, I am looking forward to actually knowing where the gym is, understanding what it means to level a library, and learning from a very skilled teacher. I feel so far from the person I was July 28, 2004. Now, we'll just have to see how all of my new-found confidence flies once I have 4 children sitting nicely in their seats and the other 22 trying to get my attention so they can go to the bathroom.

another tool for procrastination

Recently, I have often found myself thinking about the public versus private aspects of blogs. What makes me so compelled to have my private thoughts published in a public forum? How can the solitary action of typing on my computer change the way I connect to others? Will a blog motivate me to write, observe, connect?

Today, I in my increasingly creative methods for procrastinating (I should be studying my diagnosis of reading disorders for tomorrow's final final exam of the semester), I decided it was time. My blog is no longer just an idea. It is live.